These days, my life seems to be all about making new connections: with information, with skills, with people. Maybe you've experienced times like this when things just all come together. It seems like all the divergent parts of your life are having meetings while you sleep and you wake up and wonderful synchronicity appears before your. The pieces connect and you reap the benefits.
Two of the many interests and passions that I have are reading and jewelry. It seems unlikely to me that these very different interests would end up forging a connection in my personal life. And yet, that is what has happened. Recently these loves have come together in a wonderful way to help me stay connected with the most important love in my life, my husband.
For Better
I enjoy reading about to the "do's and don'ts" of relationships and marriage which is why was inspired to read the new book For Better: The Science of a Good Marriage by Tara Parker-Pope which examines the scientific data surrounding why marriages fail or succeed. One gem of wisdom that I found in this book is that all those little nice things that you do for each other every day really do make a difference long term. So go ahead, write him a mushy text or email. Hide something in her car. He/She will love it. It's not too much to ask in the name of staying connected. In light of this realization, when a recent piece of jewelry that I made caught the eye of my man (who's normally not the jewelry wearing type) I knew I was staring one of those "nice little things" right in the face.
Want to know what it was? Have I built up enough suspense? Ok ok. It was a totally bad-ass ring that I made in a class I attended at Bead Fest in PA. I took a Lisa Claxton workshop called "The Break-Up Ring" so named because she created this ring in the aftermath of a relationship break up. It was a short and sweet class that totally delivered. I finished my ring and wore it proudly during the 5 hour drive home. When I got home and my husband saw the ring, he immediately took it off my hand on put it on his pinky finger, looked at it for about 30 seconds and promptly asked me to make him two of them. To be worn on the same finger at the same time. Connected. (I'm working on that. It might be a while.)
Making A Connection
Since then, the Break-Up Ring has somewhat ironically (given it's name) taken on a special meaning between us. We wear our wedding bands, but this is different. Due to our jobs, we are not in the same state very often, nor can he wear this ring while he is working. So this ring has become something of a time-share for the two of us. When he's not wearing it, it's with me. And at the risk of sounding like a smitten school girl, for me it represents a special connection to him. I know he loves that I made the ring, and loves wearing it because of that. (And because it's freakin' awesome!) After all, he's my biggest fan. Seeing him wear this ring with such obvious pride is a reminder that he's on my team and in my tribe, giving me support on my creative journey. Having your spouse on your team is a really good thing. I'm confident that Tara Parker-Pope would agree.
Your turn! Do you have any rituals or objects that represent a special connection to someone in your life? I'd love to hear about them!